A Stoner’s Guide to Valentine’s Day

March 09, 2022

By Emma Grace

It’s that time of year again--between the chaotic holidays and the coming of spring, there’s this one not-so-insignificant date on the calendar that everyone (and I mean everyone) is painfully aware of. That’s right, folks. It’s Valentine’s season.

Most people fall into one of two categories: the blissfully taken, or the painfully single. There’s also the happily single and unhappily spoken for, but those are less popular camps. But, here at The Blvd, we all have one thing in common regardless of our relationship statuses: we smoke weed.

So whether you’re single, taken, or in a situationship (been there, done that), we’ve put together an all-you-need-to-know guide for a toasty V-Day. We’ll cover the best products for a happy high, our favorite weed-themed dates, and what Mary-Jane-themed products to get your MJ.

Best Strains for Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is all about love and good vibes, so we’ve put together a list of our favorite strains to amplify those feelings. Even if you’re flying solo this V-Day, it’s still your day! Self-care is important, too, so we suggest showing yourself a little love and trying out one or more of these fabulous strains:

Green Crack (aka Cush). Snoop Dogg named this popular strain for its’ energetic, uplifting effects. It’s Sativa-heavy, and the perfect wake n’ bake strain to get your day started. The cerebral high won’t cloud up your mind, but you’ll be feeling happy and focused all day long.
Laughing Buddha. Another Sativa-dominant hybrid, this strain is sure to give you the giggles. The citrus terpenes are easy on the tastebuds, and this is a perfect strain for both solo dates and social gatherings (did somebody say Gal-entine’s Day?)
Black Diamond. A more Indica-heavy strain, Black Diamond is also sure to give you the giggles. This strain is better suited for a chill night in with a movie and snacks--eventually you might notice a bit of couch-lock going on, so get comfy!

Weed-Themed Date Ideas

Now that you have some ideas for what to smoke, it’s time to figure out what to do when you smoke. Whether you’re with a significant other, group of friends, or kickin’ it solo, these date ideas are for you!

Go out to eat. I know, it’s traditional, but sometimes it really is nice to go out to a restaurant and have a sit-down meal. Make sure you schedule an Uber, Lyft, or find a ride, since driving high is super irresponsible. Eating out while high, however, can be extra fun especially if you have the giggles. Plus, this can also satiate all your cravings--just be sure to make a reservation, since V-Day is usually more like D-Day in the restaurant industry!

Pro-tip: go out to eat at the end of the night! If you go out too early you’ll end up stuffed, and all you’ll want to do is go home and veg out on the couch (and maybe knock boots with your sig. other). Make the most of the evening by doing something before dinner, then getting food, then going home (and knockin’ boots).

Play some sports/exercise. This one might sound a little unconventional, but working out while high can be a really fun experience. Try something new, like dance or boxing, coupled with an easygoing body high. Or, if you’re a runner, try smoking before hitting the pavement. Couples’ yoga can also be really enjoyable. However, don’t try anything crazy while high. Avoid lifting super heavy, using heavy machinery, or driving.
Watch a movie. Another basic one, but sometimes all we want to do at the end of a long day is sit back, relax, and watch something funny (or cheesy). You can order takeout to satisfy the munchies, wear your comfiest pajamas, and watch your favorite movie. You’ll find that smoking beforehand really enhances the experience.
Play a game. Games like Clue, Pictionary, and Life are way more fun when you’re stoned, as long as you can think straight. If you’re with a group of bachelors or bachelorettes on V-Day, this is a great option. Baked charades can be really fun, too, or even a puzzle.
Tour a weed farm. This one is way more accessible to folks in the western U.S., but booking a tour of a weed farm can be not only educational but a lot of fun. You can learn about the inner workings of the farm, how weed is processed from flower to product, and some farms have an onsite dispensary. Check out these tour-able farms for date night (or be bold and go solo! You could meet your special someone)

Weed-Lover Gift Guide

If your Valentine is a smoker, you might be wondering what to get them. Purchasing the perfect V-Day gift can be stressful, we know (is this too sentimental? Not sentimental enough? Too expensive, or not expensive enough? Ugh!). That’s why we’ve compiled this list of the perfect products you can get your smokin-hot Valentine, regardless of your price range.

Chocolate-Covered CBD Gummies. These adorable gummies are a safe, budget-friendly option. They’re cute, Valentine’s-Day themed, and organic+vegan. If these don’t float your boat, however, Greater Goods has a ton of yummy products to choose from.
CBD Lube. If you wanna spice things up a bit this V-Day (or any day, really), consider purchasing this CBD Lube. It’s all-natural and safe to put anywhere, anytime.
Custom Lighter. A custom lighter is a great, practical idea if your partner isn’t into the more traditional V-Day gifts. You can get it customized to say pretty much anything, and it’s a great budget option, too.
Weed Bouquet. If you want to splurge, consider a weed bouquet. They’re pretty pricey, but you and your partner (or you alone, of course) will be too stoned to care. If you ration your bouquet, it’ll also last a while, so consider it an investment!
Baja Hoodie (aka Drug Rug). Have you met a stoner who doesn’t own one of these? If the answer is yes, make them your Valentine ASAP and get them one of these. They’re sustainable, durable, and adorable (a win-win-win). Plus, they’re a style-stape for stoners.
Weed-Themed V-Day Cards. If you want to keep things a bit more low-key, a weed-themed card is lighthearted and budget-friendly. Plus, by purchasing off Etsy, you’re supporting a small business. There are hundreds to choose from, and one that perfectly fits your Valentine.
421Store Merch. If you really love your significant other, you’ll get them some MonroeBlvd merchandise! We offer apparel, smoking accessories, CBD products, and even hemp roast coffee. And since we love love, use the promo code ‘20off’ to receive 20% off your entire order.

And that, folks, is monroeblvd’s stoner-themed guide to V-Day. We hope you have a lovely day of love, be it with friends, a partner, or on your own. And don’t forget--all that Valentine’s chocolate goes on sale on February 15th. Be sure to stock up for when the munchies hit! Stay chill, stay happy, and stay toasty.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Emma Grace is a full-time student, writer, and lover of Marvel movies. She spends most of her time ignoring her responsibilities in favor of reading, learning global geography, and finding new ways to prepare instant noodles. She lives with her parents and sister and a very needy dog named Eloise.